Photo by Beth Maree. Note my son with his Spiderman.
Not pictured: our resident 1-year-old, Tess, who always crawls towards the altar!
Something kind of beautiful happens at my church every Sunday: many of the kids sit either in the front or near the front of the sanctuary.
If you’ve gone to church at all, you know this is not the norm. Kids sit in the back. Parents of kids sit in the back with them.
It is reasonable that this happens: it’s convenient to leave if you need to; it’s possibly less disruptive to others; if a mother has to nurse, it’s more private. This all makes sense. And there is an argument that children do need to be taught to sit and listen. The problem is when parents and kids feel relegated to the back as if they aren’t welcome to sit wherever they want. And frankly, kids pay better attention when they are up close anyway!
Oftentimes during church, my son (8) is playing with his stuffed animals (that he never fails to bring). Sometimes it bugs me and I feel like my worship is interrupted by his play. I literally have to work through it in my head: what would Jesus say or do if he was here?
Usually when I ask this question, I have to work out the answer based on what I know about Jesus’s character. But this is one of those rare times we actually have a verse that answers the question!
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14)
Perhaps this verse is used so much for Children’s Ministry that it’s lost its potency, but just think about it. It was so important to Jesus and so imprinted on the minds of the early disciples that it makes it into two different gospel accounts! Jesus cares about little children. He wants them to be up front near him. He even goes so far to say that theirs is the kingdom of heaven!
Henri Nouwen says:
“I have always been complaining that my work was constantly interrupted; then I realized that the interruptions were my work.”
I feel this quote deeply. But I think you can also substitute “work” for “worship” and it is still true. (N.B. You could also argue that our work is a type of worship, but that’s a post for another day.)
I have always been complaining that my [worship] was constantly interrupted; then I realized that the interruptions were my [worship].
So when my son is playing, instead of being annoyed at the interruption, I remember that I should prioritize play in the presence of Jesus; that I should delight in my son’s play as an act of worship; that I should remember that the kids are the ministry and future of the church. Shouldn’t they feel as welcomed as any adults?
My daughter (11) recently said to me that she wished we had church more than once a week, because she feels so at home there. As a mother and as a director of Children’s Ministries, I was delighted. That is how church should feel: like home.
What would churches look like if we all delighted in the interruptions of children? If we prioritized play in our own lives? If we let the kids sit up front? If we laughed, instead of scorned, at their antics? If we got to know them and heard their stories and what’s on their hearts?
Maybe church would feel more like home to all of us.